Reversing Time
Since my last meaningful post, we've traveled through Loas and Vietnam, and returned to Thailand for a journey into the southern regions. But, before I distill our most recent ventures, I must once again use my profound and inexplicable understanding of quantum mechanics, and return to Bangkok, where our exploits once again found furtile ground for additional growth.
The book indicated the ploy as an introduction to the potential hazards of Bangkok. Be forwarned, the book reads, con-artists, disguised as friendly, welcoming locals, will use polite conversation, mixed with discreet, stategically placed lies and mis-information, to convince the naive, trusting traveler into an alternative destination. This new ride would include a taxi or tuk-tuk driver transporting us not to the wonderous temples and monuments of Bangkok, but to silk shops, travel agencies, and smaller, much more insignificant sites. The kind of sites a Morlock from Time Machine, or an orc from Lord of the Rings would visit if they had an opportunity to spend any time in Thailand.
He was sharp and inquisitive. He began with simple, benign questions, and quickly transitioned into brief lessons in negotiation when confronted with taxi and tuk-tuk drivers. He pointed out how to differentiate between private and government regulated vehicles based on license plate colors. He demonstrated his skills by nodding to a tuk-tuk driver across the street, pointing out the color of the license plate to verify his claim, and with great flair and dramatic display, negotiated what seemed like an exceptionally reasonable price for a ride into the unknown. Their must have been a parasite in my brain limiting intellectual thought, because I was lulled into acquiesence like an alcoholic confronted with a sea full of beer.
So we boarded the devilish carriage, with the young Thai driver, and became statistics for next years round of travel guides. The tuk-tuk (which is Thai for unsafe, three wheeled vehicle that spews noxious fumes diesel fumes) raced through the streets of Bangkok, jolting us to a temple with a massive standing Buddha. It appeared impressive at the time, but in retrospect, after seeing the Grand Palace and the Great Reclining Buddha, this temple, comparitively speaking, seemed more like mold, or dried up sea cucumbers decomposing on the beach. Nonetheless, wondered and inspected, marveling at the detail and color. We each found monuments of our animals from the Chinese zodiac. We thenceforth became a traveling band of ferocious and despised animals - the tiger (Keith), the snake (myself), and the rat (Aimie). Their must be some kind of raft across the river type of riddle for our crew, but I have yet to think of it.
After suitable observing the entire complex, we boarded the tri-wheeled transportation vehicle, and were quickly informed that we needed to visit the travel agency immediately. At this point, we all realized the extent of our gullibility, and vehemently refused the demanding offer. It's necessary to point out that Keith suspected the ruse from the beginning, but apparently didn't have a problem engaging in the devious affair. In response to the suggestion of a pleasant trip to the travel agency, we countered with a request for the Grand Palace, our original destination. He compromised with the Black Buddha. The Black Buddha I wondered, that sounds intriguing. A greater man would have demanded either the Grand Palace or our original location, and if refused, would have argueed vigorously and indignantly until satisfaction finally rose from the depths. But, that's with someone like Spartacus, Ben Hur, or Jesus. Unfortunately, this travel log only chronicles the travels of a gullible and trusting explorer, who hap-hazardly wonders into ridiculous situations, notible only for their mindboggling absurdity. Anyway, we arrive at the Black Buddha temple or "wat", as they're referred to as in the Thai language. As anyone might have expected, other than me or course, the temple was closed due to meditating monks. Fair enough. Monks, according to lore, engage in a significant quantity of meditation, so why not now, the only opportunity in my life when I'll be able to gaze upon the marvels of the Black Buddha. After some brief deliberation, we decided to wait for the monks to complete their daily ritual. While waiting, a conversation was initiated by a man who informed us that the monks were involved in some special ceremony, and that instead of standing around, we should visit a tailor, who happened to be having a one-day, half-price sale on all silk clothing and suits. Well, how coincidental. I just happened to require a hot linen suit for the rest of my travels in Southeast Asia. I was really beginning to lose my temper at this point, and for anyone who knows me well, this essentially means nothing. The strategically placed Thai linen shop instructed the tuk-tuk driver to take us to the clothing store. We once again requested, quite poignantly, the Grand Palace. He refused, insisting that we stop by the clothing store so he could pick up a "coupon", which would benefit him with some type of lackee compensation. Fine, we said, knowing that any further debate would probably leave us stranded somewhere on the streets of Bangkok, where we would become crime fighting vigilantees, living on trash, and saving unsuspecting travelers from pleasant speaking con-artists.
So, we end up at the tailor, where apparently everything is fifty percent off all the time. We look around, I decide to buy a silk scarf for what turns out to be a highly inflated price, and the tuk-tuk driver finally decides to take us back to the location where we began. From here we worked our way into the Grand Palace. The temples and stupas here stand with unbelievable detail and extravagance. The tight density of the structures successfully increases the magnificance. It makes the wondering observer seem small and insignificant. The exterior is matched well by the primary atraction at the Grand Palace - the Emerald Buddha. The little green God sits high above the ground in the main temple, looking down over dozens of other Buddha statues, ornate decorations, and a host of kneeling observers.
We spent a few more days in Bangkok, visiting other attractions, and then made our way up to Chiang Mai via the sleeper train.
Chiang Mai and the notorious time in Luang Prabang will follow shortly.
The book indicated the ploy as an introduction to the potential hazards of Bangkok. Be forwarned, the book reads, con-artists, disguised as friendly, welcoming locals, will use polite conversation, mixed with discreet, stategically placed lies and mis-information, to convince the naive, trusting traveler into an alternative destination. This new ride would include a taxi or tuk-tuk driver transporting us not to the wonderous temples and monuments of Bangkok, but to silk shops, travel agencies, and smaller, much more insignificant sites. The kind of sites a Morlock from Time Machine, or an orc from Lord of the Rings would visit if they had an opportunity to spend any time in Thailand.
He was sharp and inquisitive. He began with simple, benign questions, and quickly transitioned into brief lessons in negotiation when confronted with taxi and tuk-tuk drivers. He pointed out how to differentiate between private and government regulated vehicles based on license plate colors. He demonstrated his skills by nodding to a tuk-tuk driver across the street, pointing out the color of the license plate to verify his claim, and with great flair and dramatic display, negotiated what seemed like an exceptionally reasonable price for a ride into the unknown. Their must have been a parasite in my brain limiting intellectual thought, because I was lulled into acquiesence like an alcoholic confronted with a sea full of beer.
So we boarded the devilish carriage, with the young Thai driver, and became statistics for next years round of travel guides. The tuk-tuk (which is Thai for unsafe, three wheeled vehicle that spews noxious fumes diesel fumes) raced through the streets of Bangkok, jolting us to a temple with a massive standing Buddha. It appeared impressive at the time, but in retrospect, after seeing the Grand Palace and the Great Reclining Buddha, this temple, comparitively speaking, seemed more like mold, or dried up sea cucumbers decomposing on the beach. Nonetheless, wondered and inspected, marveling at the detail and color. We each found monuments of our animals from the Chinese zodiac. We thenceforth became a traveling band of ferocious and despised animals - the tiger (Keith), the snake (myself), and the rat (Aimie). Their must be some kind of raft across the river type of riddle for our crew, but I have yet to think of it.After suitable observing the entire complex, we boarded the tri-wheeled transportation vehicle, and were quickly informed that we needed to visit the travel agency immediately. At this point, we all realized the extent of our gullibility, and vehemently refused the demanding offer. It's necessary to point out that Keith suspected the ruse from the beginning, but apparently didn't have a problem engaging in the devious affair. In response to the suggestion of a pleasant trip to the travel agency, we countered with a request for the Grand Palace, our original destination. He compromised with the Black Buddha. The Black Buddha I wondered, that sounds intriguing. A greater man would have demanded either the Grand Palace or our original location, and if refused, would have argueed vigorously and indignantly until satisfaction finally rose from the depths. But, that's with someone like Spartacus, Ben Hur, or Jesus. Unfortunately, this travel log only chronicles the travels of a gullible and trusting explorer, who hap-hazardly wonders into ridiculous situations, notible only for their mindboggling absurdity. Anyway, we arrive at the Black Buddha temple or "wat", as they're referred to as in the Thai language. As anyone might have expected, other than me or course, the temple was closed due to meditating monks. Fair enough. Monks, according to lore, engage in a significant quantity of meditation, so why not now, the only opportunity in my life when I'll be able to gaze upon the marvels of the Black Buddha. After some brief deliberation, we decided to wait for the monks to complete their daily ritual. While waiting, a conversation was initiated by a man who informed us that the monks were involved in some special ceremony, and that instead of standing around, we should visit a tailor, who happened to be having a one-day, half-price sale on all silk clothing and suits. Well, how coincidental. I just happened to require a hot linen suit for the rest of my travels in Southeast Asia. I was really beginning to lose my temper at this point, and for anyone who knows me well, this essentially means nothing. The strategically placed Thai linen shop instructed the tuk-tuk driver to take us to the clothing store. We once again requested, quite poignantly, the Grand Palace. He refused, insisting that we stop by the clothing store so he could pick up a "coupon", which would benefit him with some type of lackee compensation. Fine, we said, knowing that any further debate would probably leave us stranded somewhere on the streets of Bangkok, where we would become crime fighting vigilantees, living on trash, and saving unsuspecting travelers from pleasant speaking con-artists.
So, we end up at the tailor, where apparently everything is fifty percent off all the time. We look around, I decide to buy a silk scarf for what turns out to be a highly inflated price, and the tuk-tuk driver finally decides to take us back to the location where we began. From here we worked our way into the Grand Palace. The temples and stupas here stand with unbelievable detail and extravagance. The tight density of the structures successfully increases the magnificance. It makes the wondering observer seem small and insignificant. The exterior is matched well by the primary atraction at the Grand Palace - the Emerald Buddha. The little green God sits high above the ground in the main temple, looking down over dozens of other Buddha statues, ornate decorations, and a host of kneeling observers.We spent a few more days in Bangkok, visiting other attractions, and then made our way up to Chiang Mai via the sleeper train.
Chiang Mai and the notorious time in Luang Prabang will follow shortly.
posted by rick the sashquach (with a giant brain) at 7:03 AM
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